EARTH'S GREATEST NATURAL RESOURCE: OUR MINDS & ATTENTION

    

     Lately I have found myself frequently reminding my students and my son that each person is wealthy beyond measure, yet everyday that wealth is squandered and surrendered to other sources. Ever stop to think about what life would be like if you spent your time on you instead of other things and other people?

     As innocuous an activity as watching television is, many people are devoted to their favorite programs. Yet, do you stop and think about what those programs do for you?  Does the programming improve the quality of your life?  Does the program contribute to your financial or physical well-being?  Of course, we all need to decompress and relax sometime.  So many people ask, what is the harm in watching television after a long day of work or school?  Nothing is wrong if you do not mind letting down your subconscious guard and allowing your mind to be invaded by ideas and messages that are sent through the airwaves to inspire you to part with your money and time.  When you watch television or a movie you are empowering someone else's vision.

     There are people who are very disciplined in financial matters.  Their needs and wants are closely monitored, yet copious amounts of time will be spent taking in tales of vampires, fighting housewives, and promiscuous drones prowling the country in search of the next orgasm.  I hope more people begin to ask why are we driven to distraction to such a degree?  There was a time when television signed off. We were given a break to contemplate the silence and be with ourselves.  That is no longer the policy.  Every second of every minute, of every day is programmed for any willing person.  How much time do we spend on our personal visions?  How much time does the average person spend creating for himself/herself?  There was a time I used to cover the television with beautiful African textiles and I have refused to purchase cable or satellite service since 1992.  I love thinking and creating my own entertainment.  I don't like sitting idle in front of a screen.  If I'm in front of a screen, I'm writing.

     I am aware that some people want to escape their lives.  They would prefer to experience life through someone else’s lenses.  That is a choice we all have, but I challenge that the lives we are given are so precious and sweet.  Giving them up to and casting pearls before swine is such an ungrateful way to exist.  The least we can do when we get up everyday is make an effort to find a our purposes, fulfill our purposes and leave a divine template for our children to follow or recreate.

     When I hear people complain about their lives, I can't help but think to myself that had they simply sat down and planned, they would not have to react.  It can’t be fun living in constant survival mode, going from one near catastrophe to another. However, if the majority of your life consists of getting to the nearest television as soon as possible, there is little time for anything else.  Lately, I have heard people say “stay ready,” but how can anyone stay ready when they are always in front of a television?

      The best times in my life have been sitting in a circle of friends talking about our visions, laughing and appreciating the vibe.  I need more people in my life to enjoy that too.  I cannot sit through another conversation about a celebrity’s outfit or which housewife snatched another one’s weave out.  My spirit is exhausted.  Wake me when the television goes off.

Problem? What Problem?

     The wonderful thing about aging is the discovery that there are infinite opportunities to learn and grow.  My latest epiphany was the realization that the only problems that exist are the problems I perceive in my mind.  I was going to an event and I knew that I was going to see an individual there. In my mind, I created an entire scenario and became agitated at the thought of attending the event. Luckily, I stopped myself before I went in and I determined to keep an open mind. Once inside the event, I inevitably ran into the person I dreaded seeing, and that person was who he always is. The difference was that I chose not to accept it as a problem. It did not affect me because I did not allow it to. As simple as that.

     Have you ever tried to disappoint yourself before anybody else could? Sure you have. Whenever you predict that someone will turn you down or reject you, you just did it for yourself before anybody else could.  People who are used to disappointment often hurt themselves before others can or they prepare themselves for disappointment before encounters to alleviate the hurt they believe they will experience.  I became aware of this and the affect of this self-sabotaging habit on my relationships.  I have to be aware of my thoughts and stop myself when I begin to prepare for imagined disappointment.

     To overcome this habit, I also have to re-live unpleasant memories of the times I have been profoundly hurt and disappointed. I remember and observe the child I was and understand the incident as an adult. I work through it for as long and as many times as I have to so that the pain is appropriately placed, in the past. When I was a toddler, I remember how my mom would get dressed to go out. It was so exciting to see her look so glamorous, but that heart-wrenching feeling of sadness as she walked out the door broke my heart. I always felt left behind and rejected. All my life I carried the dread of people leaving me behind. I began leaving people before they could leave me. I would go to events and leave early every time. When I go to church, I leave early. Friends never have to tell me to leave because I am out before we even get comfortable. I am so good at leaving relationships that I call myself an escape artist. Not funny at all.

     How do I change this habit? How do I release myself from this prison? I train my mind to see solutions, not problems. I approach life as if every situation will work out in my favor...even after someone says no...even after it does not have the result I imagined. What I have come to appreciate is that when a situation appears one way, it is actually unfolding beyond my control to result in a greater blessing and a divine circumstance than I could have ever created on my own.

     We experience disappointment and hurt feelings when we hold on to our thoughts of how things should be.  We cannot get stuck on the way we think it should be; we have to let go and work with the way things are. If the way things are does not serve us, we do not have to entertain it.  We do not have to accept another person's negativity.  All we can do is acknowledge the issue and focus on solutions. That is the key. The current state of being may not be our ideal but the only way out is to keep our minds focused and engaged in the answer to the issue. It is not a problem until our minds identify the experience as such.