EARTH'S GREATEST NATURAL RESOURCE: OUR MINDS & ATTENTION

    

     Lately I have found myself frequently reminding my students and my son that each person is wealthy beyond measure, yet everyday that wealth is squandered and surrendered to other sources. Ever stop to think about what life would be like if you spent your time on you instead of other things and other people?

     As innocuous an activity as watching television is, many people are devoted to their favorite programs. Yet, do you stop and think about what those programs do for you?  Does the programming improve the quality of your life?  Does the program contribute to your financial or physical well-being?  Of course, we all need to decompress and relax sometime.  So many people ask, what is the harm in watching television after a long day of work or school?  Nothing is wrong if you do not mind letting down your subconscious guard and allowing your mind to be invaded by ideas and messages that are sent through the airwaves to inspire you to part with your money and time.  When you watch television or a movie you are empowering someone else's vision.

     There are people who are very disciplined in financial matters.  Their needs and wants are closely monitored, yet copious amounts of time will be spent taking in tales of vampires, fighting housewives, and promiscuous drones prowling the country in search of the next orgasm.  I hope more people begin to ask why are we driven to distraction to such a degree?  There was a time when television signed off. We were given a break to contemplate the silence and be with ourselves.  That is no longer the policy.  Every second of every minute, of every day is programmed for any willing person.  How much time do we spend on our personal visions?  How much time does the average person spend creating for himself/herself?  There was a time I used to cover the television with beautiful African textiles and I have refused to purchase cable or satellite service since 1992.  I love thinking and creating my own entertainment.  I don't like sitting idle in front of a screen.  If I'm in front of a screen, I'm writing.

     I am aware that some people want to escape their lives.  They would prefer to experience life through someone else’s lenses.  That is a choice we all have, but I challenge that the lives we are given are so precious and sweet.  Giving them up to and casting pearls before swine is such an ungrateful way to exist.  The least we can do when we get up everyday is make an effort to find a our purposes, fulfill our purposes and leave a divine template for our children to follow or recreate.

     When I hear people complain about their lives, I can't help but think to myself that had they simply sat down and planned, they would not have to react.  It can’t be fun living in constant survival mode, going from one near catastrophe to another. However, if the majority of your life consists of getting to the nearest television as soon as possible, there is little time for anything else.  Lately, I have heard people say “stay ready,” but how can anyone stay ready when they are always in front of a television?

      The best times in my life have been sitting in a circle of friends talking about our visions, laughing and appreciating the vibe.  I need more people in my life to enjoy that too.  I cannot sit through another conversation about a celebrity’s outfit or which housewife snatched another one’s weave out.  My spirit is exhausted.  Wake me when the television goes off.

Problem? What Problem?

     The wonderful thing about aging is the discovery that there are infinite opportunities to learn and grow.  My latest epiphany was the realization that the only problems that exist are the problems I perceive in my mind.  I was going to an event and I knew that I was going to see an individual there. In my mind, I created an entire scenario and became agitated at the thought of attending the event. Luckily, I stopped myself before I went in and I determined to keep an open mind. Once inside the event, I inevitably ran into the person I dreaded seeing, and that person was who he always is. The difference was that I chose not to accept it as a problem. It did not affect me because I did not allow it to. As simple as that.

     Have you ever tried to disappoint yourself before anybody else could? Sure you have. Whenever you predict that someone will turn you down or reject you, you just did it for yourself before anybody else could.  People who are used to disappointment often hurt themselves before others can or they prepare themselves for disappointment before encounters to alleviate the hurt they believe they will experience.  I became aware of this and the affect of this self-sabotaging habit on my relationships.  I have to be aware of my thoughts and stop myself when I begin to prepare for imagined disappointment.

     To overcome this habit, I also have to re-live unpleasant memories of the times I have been profoundly hurt and disappointed. I remember and observe the child I was and understand the incident as an adult. I work through it for as long and as many times as I have to so that the pain is appropriately placed, in the past. When I was a toddler, I remember how my mom would get dressed to go out. It was so exciting to see her look so glamorous, but that heart-wrenching feeling of sadness as she walked out the door broke my heart. I always felt left behind and rejected. All my life I carried the dread of people leaving me behind. I began leaving people before they could leave me. I would go to events and leave early every time. When I go to church, I leave early. Friends never have to tell me to leave because I am out before we even get comfortable. I am so good at leaving relationships that I call myself an escape artist. Not funny at all.

     How do I change this habit? How do I release myself from this prison? I train my mind to see solutions, not problems. I approach life as if every situation will work out in my favor...even after someone says no...even after it does not have the result I imagined. What I have come to appreciate is that when a situation appears one way, it is actually unfolding beyond my control to result in a greater blessing and a divine circumstance than I could have ever created on my own.

     We experience disappointment and hurt feelings when we hold on to our thoughts of how things should be.  We cannot get stuck on the way we think it should be; we have to let go and work with the way things are. If the way things are does not serve us, we do not have to entertain it.  We do not have to accept another person's negativity.  All we can do is acknowledge the issue and focus on solutions. That is the key. The current state of being may not be our ideal but the only way out is to keep our minds focused and engaged in the answer to the issue. It is not a problem until our minds identify the experience as such.

THE VISION

 

The social climate in the US is scorching. People are rightfully passionate, and even angry. Some of us have taken to the streets, while others are putting their minds together on social media and in meeting rooms to strategize the next steps in the struggle.  The important discussion to have with ourselves and with each other is, if what is happening in our society is what I do not want, then what do I want to see in its place?

We get so caught up reacting to what it is that we do not want, that we give little or no energy to thinking about what it is we really want to experience.  If we do not do the work of planning to successfully change injustice with what we need, then we should expect very little to no change.  Besides, investing precious energy and time in solutions is much more productive than complaining or becoming a victim.

Can we allow ourselves to see the reality we want and free ourselves from the paralyzing images played out on the television? Some people find it difficult to entertain the thoughts and mental images they truly desire; they even resist.  We are so comfortable saying what we do not want or do not like, but sometimes articulating what we want or receiving what we want can be challenging.  When we see situations that we do not like or experience feelings that make us feel uncomfortable, our first reaction has to be to immediately hold the image in our minds of what it is we want.

The vision I have is:

• a world where ALL people are treated with respect and dignity
• a world where EVERY child grows up feeling loved and protected
• a world where women and elders are valued
• a world where the greatest conflict we witness are people’s personal struggles to free themselves of  mental and spiritual bondage

I don’t want to use the word daydream, but I encourage the imagining and the visioning that allows our minds to create what may not be in front of us.  We cannot afford to remain locked in the nightmare created by megalomaniacs who program us through broadcast television and cable/satellite shows.  The world’s greatest natural resource is our minds.  No one person can lead us to the promised land.  We individually and collectively have to have a vision that begins when we hold the thought and image in our minds.

I believe in you.  I believe in the infinite potential of the majority of people in this world who desire peace.



FORGIVENESS

I took some time off, not from the vision, but the blog.  At first I beat myself up about it.  Then I realized that, although I deserved it, being hyper critical of myself in the situation was not going to illicit the kind of results I need right now.   The break was a necessary part of the process.  I struggle with the discipline of consistency. I forgive myself and move on, vowing to not repeat the cycle.

 

 

Some perceived setbacks are necessary incubating periods. Even to me that sounds like a crock of fooey.  As disappointing as it is to lose momentum and be inconsistent, there is only so much time I can spend beating myself up about it before I have to decide to move forward.  In the process, I chose to love myself through the experience.

 

 

With a military dad and a mother who had a military dad, the consequences of not meeting standards always involved a certain amount of yelling and punitive actions.  Throughout my adult life, I have played and replayed those admonishing voices in my head.  No one has ever been more critical of me than myself thanks to mom and dad.  However, I appreciate the distance it has brought me in life, but I recognize that this inner process is outmoded and needs to be adjusted.

 

That eight year-old in me, the one that works so hard to do things right and please those around me, needs to be motivated differently.  When I do not meet my expectations, I will encourage myself to stand up straight and try again.  I will smile at that little girl who bows her head in disappointment of failure and engulf her in love and acceptance.  Finally, what I have learned is that perfect execution is not necessarily the goal, it is the effort and the intention of NEVER bowing to defeat which is the ultimate achievement. Winning, being first, having success the way others experience it may not be my process.  I will keep trying in the way that I know how.  I am sure I will eventually make it to the model of success that is tailor-made for me.  I thought it would happen sooner in my life, yet I get the feeling that I am learning so much more from this journey that I have chosen.  My mantra is “As long as I’m living, I’m going to keep working toward the vision.”

I forgive myself for not working harder, for lying down in defeat, for feeling sorry for myself and for being lazy.  I do not excuse it. I recognize it and choose this moment to do something about it.  And so it is.

One Great Tool in the Arsenal

 

     Since I found myself in a slump for the past two weeks, I pulled up a book I had downloaded on my iPad two years ago.  I listened to the audiobook about ten years ago and four years ago I read the book.  Completing the exercises in the workbook is a totally different experience.

 

     Doing the work is a much more fulfilling activity than simply reading about doing the work.  This is the reason why we should equip ourselves with as much arsenal as possible in the war against stagnation.  For me, it is a fight, but one worth getting into because this is my life.  I'm not going down without a fight.  I'm not going down, period.

 

     It is possible to go overboard with the self-help books, tapes, workshops, lectures, etc.  So, if more information is being taken in than is being processed, then I would say it is time to slow down.  Take a minute to practice and apply tools before picking new ones up.

BE BOLD LIVE LIFE

 

     When I was three,  I was at a pool party with my grandparents.  It was a wonderful night; there were all kinds of people and, incredibly, they noticed me and made me feel special.  There was a magic show, and I remember having a front-row seat with my grandparents.  The Magician picked me to participate in his act, and when I was about to approach him, my grandmother pulled me back.  Her action was imperceptible to everyone but me.  No one understood why I did not go forward; I was confused and did not know what to do.  All I knew was that my grandmother’s action led me to believe that I should not participate.  The magician chose a half-dozen other kids; I watched as they received prizes, toy balloons and had the best time I had ever seen kids have.  That disappointment set so deep inside of me.

 

    Throughout my life there were so many times that I hesitated and was passed over.  Every time that feeling of disappointment and sadness seethed inside of me.  There were times, however, that I was able to bypass that programming and act.  The swim instructor challenged me to jump from the 12-foot diving board into the deep end of the olympic-size pool.  The only hesitation there was, was me telling myself to go for it.  It took years for me to become comfortable acting without hesitation.  My first impulse is still to stop and wait before I do anything or make any decision.  I have to consciously keep myself present and ready to act.

 

    One day, I want to be able to respond to the situation or request without hesitation and without doubt.  I work to stop beating myself up about that flaw.  Instead, I try to approach this condition of hesitation another way--turn every experience into an adventure.  I challenge myself daily to live fully, boldly and without fear.  The world has become my amusement park.  There is a thrill waiting around every corner and every situation as long as I live up to the challenge of no hesitation.

 

 

BALANCE

 

     Sometimes the greatest obstacle to our success may not be in our heads.  There are circumstances that we are unaware of at times that may contribute to the inertia in our lives.  The state or quality of balance is essential to our ability to move forward: balance of bio-chemicals, balance of emotions, balance of checkbook.

 

 

 

    For years I have dealt with anemia to one degree or another.  Anemia happens to be the imbalance or deficiency of iron from one’s system.  I was aware that anemia caused one to feel fatigued, but I never associated that condition with depression.  For months I have been struggling with trying to get things done in my life, but I just did not feel like it.  I have beat myself up mentally for not completing my projects on time, and I’ve harbored guilt about the physical feeling of not having energy.  I have been to the doctor, but never has my doctor advised me about or inquired about my mental/emotional well-being.

 

 

 

    Despite the oversight of my healthcare provider, I am taking action in creating more balance in my life.  The daily dose of iron has done wonders.  Once I complete a detox, I will be restored to my former greatness.  Exercise and diet, of course, are essential to daily emotional wellness.  There are holistic ways of coping with depression that do not require mood altering drugs.  Meditation is also a practice that can help create balance and peace in our lives.  If you feel stuck in your life and you know you have, and are willing, to do the work then there is a possibility that there is a health issue that needs to be addressed.

BE YOUR OWN LIFE COACH

When the new year begins, I'm so excited about the goals I set and the possibilities I see in my mind's eye. During a good year, I don't hit the blahs until around May/June. This year caught me struggling to remain positive about the struggle as soon as February.

 

Resolution Revolution SNL Skit

Think about it. What is it that is really keeping us from accomplishing our goals? Short of someone physically preventing us from moving forward, there is NOTHING stopping us from doing what we want with our lives.

No money? Find a way to make it.

No resources? Ask someone or seek out the people who can point in the right direction.

No education? Go to the library.

No clue? Ask somebody.

No energy? Eat right.

Bad health? As long as there is life, there is another opportunity to share the thought so that something can be done with it.

I can go on, but I will not.

For every excuse there is a solution. At the end of the day, our thoughts and our feelings about our situation provide the obstacles. Please accept this: WE ARE WHERE WE ARE RIGHT NOW BECAUSE WE ALLOW OUR THOUGHTS OR OUR FEELINGS TO PUT US HERE. Consider this scenario: I woke up this morning and when I thought about all of the things I need to do and the the problems I have to address, I felt defeated. I was tired even before I got out of bed. I asked myself "what is the point?" My grandfather asked me what am I going to do, my checking account is close to $0 and none of the employers I reached out to have responded. All day I thought about it and tried to figure out what to do. I got on the phone and talked about it to my friend who was having similar challenges. By the time I put my son to bed, I was mentally and physically exhausted but had done very little.

The problem with the above scenario is that there was no mention of waking up with a sense of gratitude for having another opportunity to get it right, despite what might have happened the day before. I spent too much time focused on problems and not solutions. To my detriment, turned to someone who got down in my hole of self-pity with me instead of helping me out. Finally, there was far too much thinking and not enough action. Even if the only thing I did was meditate, that would have cleared my mind-space for more positive thought.

Quite often we shut ourselves out from the game before we even get into the arena. Imagine for a moment, we are standing on the corner down the street thinking about the problems, the visions, the goals and the obstacles. We haven't even arrived at the gate! Is it acceptable to dwell on the thoughts "I'm depressed," "I'm overwhelmed," "I can't do it"? No! I have learned how to coach myself. We have to coach ourselves.  I’m not talking about the nice life coach that costs a million dollars a session; I’m talking about the loud coach with the whistle and spittle.  Get in your own face.

I think to myself. If I am not physically impaired, if no one is holding me down, if I have the use of my mind, I can get it done. I think about the athletes who manage to do remarkable things with their bodies. I am training and conditioning to do something as remarkable with my mind. When I begin to resist myself and the things I need to take to achieve my goals, I get really raw with myself.

Things my inner coach says to get my A in gear:

If you do not do this right now, today when will it get done? What else do you have to do that is more important than realize the vision? Your feelings are not going to get it done; action and work is going to get it done!

The pain and the resistance means you are making progress!You are

almost there! Hold it, keep pushing forward just a little longer! Don't

give up!

You tired?! You haven't even made it to the board room! You don't even have a contract to negotiate! Get real and do something or stop lying to yourself.

How bad do you want it? What does your dream mean to you? Is it worth fighting for?

At the end of the day, achieving my goals Is my only real option. The other choice is to give up and die inside. As long as I am breathing, I will do something that will take me closer to my vision. It is that simple. I do not worry about what other people say or think. If they are not trying to help me, they get tuned out. I love what the comedian Katt Williams said about that situation. He said in the face of haters and dream destroyers to "tune in to your STAR PLAYER." My star player  is me. I am my greatest supporter and motivator. I will not say that I do not need anyone or need help because I certainly do. What I emphasize here is that the source of our success lies within us. We have to want it more than anyone wants it for us.

To draw another analogy: this process is like being a recovering failure. There may be times when we fall off of the wagon and take a hit of self-pity, but there is nothing nor anyone who can save us from the sickness but us.

 

CHANGING HABITS

By Niki Billingslea

One of the “Eight Steps into the Master Mind Consciousness” states, “I decide to be changed.  I make a decision to surrender my will and my life to the Master Mind (God).  I ask to be changed at depth.”  Another one of the steps states, “I am ready to have my beliefs and attitudes changed so that my life can be transformed.”  Four years after taking my first Master Mind covenant, these words strike the very core of my being.

I think that four years ago I thought my life would change if I simply wished hard enough.  Ignorantly, I thought that my world would change and I would somehow be the same.  I was aware that I would have to do something differently, but I could not imagine that I would have to change.

Have you thought about what it means to change?  I used to think changing my life, my beliefs and my attitudes was merely doing things differently: exercise more, meditate regularly, eat healthy.  Sure, developing new habits help and facilitate a change, but those actions and habits alone do not create the deep change that is required to transform our lives.

Going back to my spiritual leaders, they say that all transformation begins with the thoughts we hold.  We have to root out the ideas that do not serve us and our feelings about the things we want to change but are unable to take action.  That is an overhaul that is no small undertaking. We have so many thoughts in the course of a day that to consciously deal with each seems daunting.

Meditation has become my salvation.  I sit and focus on the quality I am trying to create in my life.  The change that I think I want to make in order to allow for the condition I need to realize my purpose.  I meditate on it, I analyze it and I try to envision and feel it as much as possible.  Then, of course, I take steps to prepare myself for the situation.

An example, in my life, was the time I wanted a specific position at work.  The year before I was offered the position, I said YES to life.  I decided that any and every opportunity presented to me would be received with gratitude and taken advantage of.  All kinds of opportunities were presented to me--some which I had no idea how I could follow through with or fully take advantage of.

After saying yes for an entire year, with my last couple hundred dollars in the bank, and no idea of how I was going to get out of this situation without selling my soul back in a position I did not want, I received a phone call offering me the position I wanted.  Wow.  It was a wonderful moment, not because of the position but because my beliefs about what was possible were transformed.

In that year-long process, I had to push myself to do things I did not believe I could do--I was the technical and media director for a multi-disciplinary and inter-departmental project.  I was way in over my head, yet I honored my word and stuck with it.  Throughout the process, I had to keep telling myself “I am capable.  I can do it.”  I proved it to myself by preparing and learning the software I needed to execute the project.

Not all processes are so intense, but the best are.  A place to start is this web page dedicated to making change “Changing Your Habits.”

REPROGRAMMING THOUGHTS HELD IN MIND

By Niki Billingslea

When I found myself uncomfortable with the direction of my life, I called on the lessons my mother taught me.  Her life was a testament of transformation.  The stories she told me about her darkest days, and the few dark moments I witness first-hand were unbelievable when contrasted with the life she created--minister, organizer, talent manager and radio show host. She taught me to think it and be it.

She empowered me and sent me out into the world with abilities I was not fully aware of.  I knew I wanted to graduate high school and leave California.  Nobody thought I would and I did.  I decided to go to New York.  I didn’t know anyone there but I went anyway and found the exact situation my mind envisioned.  When I was done with New York I finally felt free to  dance and sing.  Just like that, when I came back to L.A., spirit provided the opportunity for me to say yes to dancing and singing professionally.

I am thankful I was able to have such powerful results with no awareness whatsoever of what I was doing.  Now that I am aware, my application of thoughts and intention are much more focused.  I act with precision, and it makes me very sensitive to the outcome of my thoughts.  Having a vision, knowing what I want and being purposeful is an empowering experience.  When experiences or people present a possible distraction, all I have to do is tune in to that guiding thought and vision to illuminate my way back to myself.

    Control of thought is not a magical mystical occurrence.  It is a rigorous and sometimes grueling undertaking--for me, that is.  Becoming aware of my thoughts and evaluating them was intense.  It was akin to watching a movie and constantly pausing and rewinding.  I didn’t mind but some people in my life didn’t get it. The people who understood helped me when I spoke in counter-productive ways.  I cannot say that I do not have to do that anymore.  Like an onion, I keep peeling back layers of thoughts, ideas and habits that I have to manually reprogram.

    The work comes in not only identifying the things I want to change, but  what I want to change them into.  Having a vision of myself creates this blueprint for me.  It is even better when I spend time feeling and seeing myself as I want to be.  This isn’t a quick fix, it is a lifetime relationship that I create with myself.  

    As I replace thoughts and habits that do not serve me with those that do, I embrace the experiences and people who help me demonstrate my new state of being.  Sometimes I have to go back to the drawing board and reassess the depth of my work.  There are times when the people or experiences help complete the process of  transformation.  This  generates various levels of discomfort.

    I used to recoil from the discomfort--run and hide emotionally.  Once I realized that the discomfort marks the threshold, I learned to take a deep breath and let go in the face of the struggle.  There is no need to fight the change I called to myself.  My students often offer the greatest opportunities for growth and change.  I used to try to protect myself and put up a wall so that they would not hurt me.  I came to understand that they were in more pain than I could ever imagine.  The insight that they are not the adversary or a threat helped me to drop my guard and be more compassionate.

I breathe through those experiences as I remind myself of why I am here and what needs to be accomplished--most often understanding.  There is also the memory of what I'm here for. When I was a child, I was very aware of my purpose for being.   Adults would consult with me and ask me for my opinion.  In those instances, I felt the spirit of God speaking through me.  I understood that it was not me but what I allowed to work in me.   My interactions with children my age had always been that of confidante and advisor.  I heal.  I empower. I give a voice to people who have been silenced.

My work as an adult is very much the same as the work I did as a child.  Have I digressed from my path? Certainly.  Have I experienced a sense of loss and confusion?  Definitely.  How do I find my way back?  I remember.  I do not try to go back in time.  I do not try to relive experiences.  I move forward with the knowledge of who I am and what I am capable of.  I think we all have this ability.  

WHY DO PEOPLE SUCCEED?

HOW BAD DO YOU WANT IT?

HITTING THE WALL

By Niki Billingslea

If you have been on your journey to realizing your purpose or pursuing a life-long goal, you know what it feels like to hit the wall.  That proverbial wall that stands between you and all of your hopes and dreams.  The one that you stare at for hours wondering what to do about it.  The people who get things done simply go through the wall, around it, or over it.  There are a number of people, for whom I write this article, who seem to think this wall is real.

    When you think you have it together this wall erects itself right in the middle of the path to your dreams.  What is up with that?  It keeps you from completing tasks you identified, it stops your flow and is a blight in your life altogether.  While you  wait for it to go away, you distract your self with people, activities and thoughts that have nothing to do with your vision.  The wall is not real.  You are lying to yourself.  You simply do not want to admit the truth to yourself.  That could be a number of things:  you have not fully committed, you are pursuing world-class goals  with small-town effort, or you are simply not doing the inner work necessary to activate that God potential in you.

    Everyone on the path experiences that period of elation and bliss with our first breakthrough.  Life is magical and we are levitating through life.  It is the best high ever.  Then that level of existence becomes normal.  The shine wears off and, if you do not continue to do the spiritual work, you fall off.  Falling off feels like being left behind or becoming detached.  If you happen to have a spiritual practice that sustains a connection with your higher source, then you at least maintain some of that blissful feeling.  Even that can become routine and something you create a blind spot to.  Kind of like that stack of papers on the table that has been there so long you do not see it any more.  That is the plateau that can turn into the wall.

    This is the point in your process when you  have to work to sustain the excitement and enthusiasm that will take you to the next level of your practice.  Some relationships are like this.  When you want to keep the passion alive, you have to make a conscious effort to put yourself in situations that elicit the energy field you want to pick up on.  I have an audiobook set that  I keep on constant rotation especially on those days when I just don’t feel like it.  There may be a time when those days turn into weeks or, God forbid, months.  You do not want to let that precious time slip through your fingers so you work to hold onto your vision.  You work to keep your goals intact.

    For me, it was like fighting for my life.  I listened to the CDs, I journaled like a crazy person, I sought out all the positive people or productive people in my phone.  I sat in the lectures and the churches soaking it up.  I forced myself to sit in meditation whether it was five minutes or thirty.  Eventually, and without my realizing it, my blahs turned into a-ha.

Getting through a tough period was not always like that.  There have been times in my life when the days turned into weeks, the weeks turned into months and the months turned into years.  To get out of it and get back on track took an equally grueling amount of time.  I got tired of it and the older I have become, the less I am willing to keep starting over from scratch. I may have a great excuse to be down and sad; however, these days I don’t allow myself the luxury of wallowing in personal pain.  I have come to enjoy proving to myself how divine I am by standing in my power.  It is exhilarating to look insecurity in the eye or fear, or whatever other obstacle and walk away with a smile and my joy intact.

   The most effective weapon against the wall is the one thing most people give up when they see it--your practice.  When obstacles erect themselves in your life, that is not the time to lie down with your belly up.  That is the perfect opportunity to become a spiritual warrior.  If you have been doing this for a while, you might have to upgrade your arsenal.  Find new tools, draw a new teacher into your life, be more open to being led.  Most importantly, DO NOT STOP prayer and meditation.  Do not stop your practice EVER.  

You may experience a bad day.  It is ok to have a bad day.  It happens to the best of us.  Take a time out, replenish, renew, relax.  Once you get a reboot, upgrade that practice and get back to it because there is no wall.  There is only your vision waiting for you to embrace it.